Today couldn't be a more beautiful day for reminding us what Easter is all about and the new life all around us has made me reflect and know that life is never truly over. Noel planted two trees for me today, and I planted some flowers and perennials which will forever be known as my "mom" trees and flowers. She loved to garden and had an amazing green thumb, so its a fitting tribute. It's especially important to me since there was no funeral, no service, no "closing" ceremony or anything, so my last memory is the one of her lying dead in her bed.
Hospice of Dayton sent me some brochures on grieving the death of a parent, and I was surprised and comforted that it included mourning the death of a not so perfect parent, and how that death symbolized the death of a "dream" that someday things would be better and the hope of having the parental love that the "inner child" still so desperately wanted. It summed up all my feelings in a little 4 page brochure, and somehow just verbalizing it and knowing that I'm not alone in that feeling made me feel better. Thanks for letting me vent - I promise to get back to jewelry real soon!
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A White Thanksgiving
20 hours ago
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2 comments:
Isn't it better to appreciate one's parents for all that they were and accept them as people...who parented as best they could with the skills they had...rather than long for all that 'coulda should woulda' been? None of us would pass THAT litmus test when our kids are in their 30-40's and judging everything we did, which we too thougth was fine at the time!
I grieve for my mother as well, for who she really was, not who I wish she was. I actually liked her despite her faults. She meant no one harm. I like my father too, and believe in the same principles he does. Actions speak louder than words, and I try to follow his examples. I try not to judge them.
I give them the benefit of the doubt. Anna's sister
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